添加收藏 联系方式
首页
如何学英语
英语语法
英语初级
英语小说
趣味英语
听歌学英语
电影学英语
 您当前位置:免费学英语 -> 趣味英语-> 五花八门
美国人搞笑电话留言
放大字体显示 缩小字体显示 打印文章
中国人并不常用电话答录机(Answering Machine),但在美国家庭,几乎家家都用。外来电话拨入时,若该电话号码的主人不在,就会让拨入者听到一段留言,这叫Answer。绝大多数的Answer都是千篇一律的:说明主人不在,请拨入者留下简短信息及姓名电话号码等。
  以下几则特别的Answer体现了美国人的幽默,你能体会出其幽默所在吗?

  (1) My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.

  (2) Hi. This is John. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

  (3) Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep(beep:主人的Answer讲完以后,Answer Machine会发出一声beep,这时候来电话者就可以开始留言了。).

  (4) Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets(磁铁). 注:通常情况下,来电话者面对录音讲话都不太自然,所以语言往往很急促,三句两句话就完了。这可苦坏了接听留言的主人,听多少遍都听不清留言者到底是谁,讲了些什么。对于母语非英文的人,这种感觉会更深。所以,以下这两段
幽默干脆就首先告诉电话拨入者,我的Answer Machine不好使,你且慢慢来。

  (5) Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped(私奔)with her tape deck(磁带驱动器), so I'm stuck with taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.

  (6) Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding(墙板,壁板), windows, or a hot tub(浴盆), and their carpets are clean. They give to charity(慈善团体)through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.

  (7) Hi. I am probably home. I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

  (8) This is not an answering machine -- this is a telepathic(心灵感应术)thought- recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call.注:tone:与对第3)句beep的注释含义完全一样,主人的Answer讲完以后,Answer Machine会发出一声beep,这时候来电话者就可以开始留言了。

  (9) Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.

  (10) If you are a burglar(夜贼), then we're probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't home and it's safe to leave us a message.

  (11) You're growing tired. Your eyelids(眼皮) are getting heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your willpower(毅力) and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to(感到无助而被迫做某事) leave your name, number, and a message.

  (12) Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.注:you have the right to remain silent:电影电视里警察出示逮捕令时常讲的一句话。西方社会讲究人权,任何疑犯在未审判之前不得认为有罪,因而不能逼供、更不可拷打:他们有权保持沉默。
到卓越网购买英语学习书籍
到当当网购买英语学习书籍
淘宝代购卓越、当当网商品
热门文章
·20句最常用口头禅
·在英语中如何形容美女
·玩游戏学英语
·怎么用英语骂人
·世界上最遥远的距离
·今夜我可以写下最哀伤的诗句
·玩游戏学英语-前缀和后缀
·过春节必用的英文
·国庆黄金周用英语怎么表达
·美国人搞笑电话留言
·用英语赞美对方
·英汉互译中的谚语巧合
·不常见的日常英语用法
·互助的意义 Peer Support
·google adsense通过西联汇款实时入帐
相关主题
  • 英语笑话4则
  • 过春节必用的英文
  • 英汉互译中的谚语巧合
  • 在英语中如何形容美女
  • 20句最常用口头禅
  • 发表评论  打印  刷新   返回顶部  关闭

    网上大名: